Thursday, 8 May 2014

To my dear friend with marriage problems

A wise friend once told me to not allow myself to be the one people always call on when they have problems. She reckons people sometimes end up associating you with their issues. At that time trying her best to not tell me again about the drama with her man. At that time I didn't really understand what she meant. Fortunately for us, perhaps because there were more happy stories shared than sad between us, I never felt like I was only relevant in bad days.

I may have spoken about this before...or I may just have kindly told a friend to not do it to me. If I did say it to anyone one-on-one, then I'm almost certain it was probably to this same friend who has me feeling so weighed down again.

Dear friend,

It makes me sad, angry and sad again to hear only your bad news. I feel used, like a crapper. 

Why me though? Do I display tendencies of a man hater who only enjoys hearing about how horrible other people's men are and advising them to get-to-stepping? Is it because I am an expert relationship talk-downer? I sincerely hope not.

I love love and men and relationships. I hate hearing how horrible your man is my friend. I don't want to get grey hair early. Actually, its just not my all.  Tell your mom...or your pastor. 

Why is it you only think of me when he's being bad? Its the third time now. Both times were followed by the birth of a baby. Both times I heard about the joyous new addition waaay later...or towards the baby shower.

Its very unfair dear friend. Please come to me when you're happy in your life. 

I am not willing to hear your problems at all. You weighed me down by just that one line. 'X is a bastard'. Please tell your best lady from the wedding...isn't that her job in your marriage? Or let's decide to share this man sommer.

I had to vent. Please go and calm down. When you come back, first apologise for doing this to me. I've never done this to you. Why do you do it to me?


For anyone else who feels the need to share with me, do remember I have two therapists I tell my crap to. Get one. 

I'm done. 

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